Jane left Tarzan for another Jane

How to get instant publicity if you are a female celebrity, don’t just end your marriage but announce you are ‘interested in trying women.’ So when Miranda Kerr joined the tribe of women ‘outing themselves as bi-curious’ I started to wonder ‘why all the attention?’

I’m not entirely convinced this is an authentic embracing of bi-sexuality. Nor am I celebrating the seeming ‘acceptance’ of this in the media, and here is why.

Miranda seems to be taking to bi-sexuality like a sport – a performance aspect. She laments that if she isn’t having enough sex her body gets out of shape, particularly her arms and abbs. Heard of push ups and crunches Miranda? ‘Personal trainer’ certainly takes on a whole new meaning if that is the case. Ok so she did the article for GQ Magazine which explains the audience clear enough, and that is my concern. Women are encouraged to ‘explore’ same sex attraction but for the pleasure of men. By declaring that she ‘still needs a man’ the idea of being with a woman is not about genuine sexual attraction but as an extension of heterosexuality.

Therefore, I can’t see her lining up with a rainbow flag any time soon. Crossing the line of acknowledging this is ‘who I am’ not just ‘something I do to spice up my sex life’ requires a commitment to speaking openly and sincerely about complex notions of sexuality, intimacy, love and identity. I’d be more excited if her ex husband Orlando Bloom announced bi-curiosity. Funny how that doesn’t seem to be as popular in the public arena.

There might be research into the ‘fluidity’ of sexual attraction and sexuality and gender differences but the LGBT community need this kind of heteronormative hijacking like the disabled community need Oscar Pistorius as a pin up boy.

When it comes to all things sexual and the ‘who, whats, wheres whys and hows of it’ we seem to take steps toward broadening our concepts of diversity but then try and contain them in other limiting normative expressions of relationships such as marriage. ‘Love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage’…because that sounds really natural, comfortable and equal.

I’m not holding my breath for a remake of Tarzan with a plot twist that could go something like this:
“Tarzan, I’m sorry but while you were great for reproducing and protecting me from wild animals, I think I want to try women, and no you can’t watch.”

With all that vine swinging, she is bound to have great arms.


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